All things pregnancy and postpartum!

Pregnancy Questions 

  1. How was the first trimester?
    1. I had a tough first trimester mostly emotionally because I was told I would not have more kids and so it was a huge shock. It is something I always wished for but knew better than to get excited. It is like I held my breath for a good two months. The doctors were honest with me about it being highly likely to not work out. It was a stressful time emotionally. It was also a lot for us as a couple going from having an only child to being pregnant. Michael was really nervous about how heart broken I could potentially be if it did not workout. 
    2. Physically I felt okay but I was nauseous for 2 weeks. I felt like every smell was so triggering and a lot of food bothered me. I also craved meat a lot which was one of my first signs. I did not eat meat for years before that. It was completely opposite of being pregnant with Avan so I felt it could be a girl. 
  2. How was your second trimester?
    1. I think for most people the second trimester is really the best part. I was not nauseous and felt like myself overall. Once week 16 came and I shared it with everyone. I felt much more confident. I started to do yoga and longer walks again as I was avoiding everything before that. I did not feel the same desire to exercise that I did with Avan. This baby was also not picky. She LOVES food while Avan’s pregnancy was particular (he is the least picky eater I know so not sure about the saying of them being picky). It was great but I was pretty happy to get into trimester 3. 
  3. How has this trimester been?
    1. I feel so fortunate to not have any pain and be able to really carry on as normal. Besides the extra belly I feel so much like myself which I do not remember feeling with Avan. Maybe it is because it is a second time and I am so much more prepared I feel. She has been pretty great so far. I am approaching the end so who knows what the remainder will hold but I do feel so grateful. I could do without the heartburn but that is my biggest problem so far. 
  4. What has been the hardest part of pregnancy?
    1. For me was the beginning and really wanting her so bad but not knowing if things would workout. Maybe that is why the physical symptoms may not seem like such a big deal. I don’t know. Maybe if I didn’t struggle at all to have babies I would be in a different head space. The only thing that has been hard outside is that I have heartburn and did not experience that last time. 
  5. What has been the best part?
    1. I LOVE being pregnant. I am that person. I love how I think, feel and am during pregnancy. I love every movement. I like the appointments. Seeing her on the ultrasound. Seeing Avan excited. I do not take this for granted as I never thought I would get this moment. I am soaking it all up. I process so much in the moment and like to share after so I do not miss things. I am sure I will have much more to say after. That is how I have been and it allows me to be present and also help others. 
  1. Did you want the gender you got? How to handle gender disappointment?
    1. I really did want just a healthy baby. I felt that deeply at first but when time came closer to knowing I wanted a girl. I think everyone has just a slight feeling of what they want. It is okay, we are human. We of course all want healthy kids so that comes first. When I got the call from the doctor I was SO happy!!! I cried tears of joy. That moment I realized I would have maybe faced a little gender disappointment if the baby was another boy but before that I did not think I cared as much. I have not experienced gender disappointment but I know many many people who have. Thousands of women on IG voted that they have too. It is okay to be sad. No, that does not mean you will not be a loving or wonderful mother. You will move past it if you let yourself feel it, ask yourself why (is it outside pressure, etc.) and allow yourself to just be in it. It will pass. 
  1. Do you worry about pooping during labor? How to overcome that fear?
    1. I do not worry about that. I probably did the first time although both the nurse and Michael said I did not. Trust me when your baby is near it will not matter if you are pooping like it does right now. The nurses have seen it all. It makes sense that you are likely to and that is because you are putting so much pressure. I would tell myself it is normal, the nurses have seen it all and my body knows what it is doing. There is nothing to be ashamed of, you are doing something really important. Once you see the baby you will not care about that at all. 
  2. Do you worry about your husband feeling less attracted to you due to seeing the birth? How to overcome that fear?
    1. I did not have this fear because Michael and I were so open with each other. Avan started to come on his own and Michael and one nurse had to hold my legs and he saw it ALL. We are very sexually active and that did not impact our drive. I would have a conversation with your husband.You should feel 100% comfortable to share these valid fears. People go back and have more kids so it must not be that traumatizing for them. Plus that is how they came into the world and how we all do. That is life. I would talk to him to overcome the fear and trust your bond. 
  3. What are you doing differently this pregnancy from the first?
    1. I am learning a lot more about postpartum stuff. With Avan I learned all the things for him and did not care as much about my healing – physically, emotionally and so on. I have been really prioritizing that. 
    2. I do not hardly google anything. WOW GAME CHANGER!! My first pregnancy I would google every little feeling and make myself all worried and paranoid. Write down your questions for your doctor/midwife and bring them with you.  
    3. I did not workout as much because my body was just telling me no. I am proud of that. I have been lately because I really feel like I want to but I think being in touch so much with my body and saying yes to it. 
    4. I am protecting my peace even more. I do not have space to argue, for negative media or anything that does not feed my soul. I will try to hang onto this after the baby too! 
  4. How can I prepare for a natural childbirth?
    1. I would start by deciding why you want to have a natural birth. Your why has to be strong so you can shut out the other options (unless medically necessary of course). 
    2. I then would learn about techniques to get through it. There are many things that are like being in a tub, birth balls, massage, etc. that can help you work through contractions. 
    3. I would watch positive birth stories and surround yourself with positive ones that are like what you want. You want to remove as much fear as possible around it.
    4. Find a doctor/midwife and hospital that have high success rates for natural birth. You need the crew around you to feel good about your choice or pick a new place/people. 
    5. Remember millions of babies have been born without any medication and if you want to you can too! If you change your mind you can always get medication. It is okay – all births are beautiful. 
    6. Just remember that people who prepare for all cases and are informed in techniques are more likely to do it. This is a big moment so I would treat it as such. 

Must have pregnancy items: 

Clothing and gear! 

  • Pjs – https://amzn.to/3LN4tSQ this is my favorite PJ dress EVER even if you are not pregnant I highly recommend it! So cute and soft. Love it! I ordered another one and it will be great postpartum too. 
  • Belly Band – I got mine from my insurance but it can help a lot as your belly gets bigger to support your back. 
  • Compression socks – great for blood flow and I got them through insurance as well. 
  • Birth Ball – https://amzn.to/3h1lz13 so great for using it as a seat. It promotes good alignment in your hips and back which is needed for giving birth. It is also great to help the baby engage. It helps with aches and pains through various positions and will be used during birth as well. 

Books and resources: 

Hospital Bag Items for me 

  • PJs
  • Bras 
  • Robe 
  • Heat Pad
  • Birth ball
  • Massage gun 
  • Headphones and speaker 
  • Birth Plan Prints
  • Toiletries – brush, hair ties, toothbrush,etc.
  • Water bottle
  • Breastfeeding pillow 
  • Snacks 
  • Flip flops
  • Going home outfit
  • ID/Wallet
  • Gum/mint candy 
  • Charger
  • Portable battery 
  • Candles (Electric) 
  • Clothes for hot and cold water 
  • Chapstick 
  • Eye mask to relax 
  • Hair ties 

Must have postpartum items 

  • Clothing items
    • The things during pregnancy help during postpartum as well as having a nice robe. 
  • Vaginal care basket after having a baby
    • Tucks
    • Dermaplast 
    • Pads 
    • Mesh underwear from hospital 
    • Spray bottle 
    • Sitz bath 
    • Sitz bath salt 
  • Set up nursing stations
    • water bottle 
    • snacks 
    • Tissues 
    • Breast pads for leaking 
    • Haaka to catch milk on the other side – https://amzn.to/3uYbhqO read the reviews you will see why it is so wonderful! 
  • Post care
    • See pelvic floor therapist at 8 weeks PP
    • Take extra self care moments to make sure you are doing okay. 
    • Go to your 6 week appointment. 
    • Advocate for what doesn’t feel right. 
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